The food was good, as was the subsequent film with a glass of red wine. The parents have retired to their bedroom and enjoy the tenderness exchanged together. But in the middle of the lovemaking, the child suddenly stands in the door and looks at them both in bewilderment. Only the others experience such an embarrassing situation – or do they? It can happen to any of us that we are “caught” by offspring while having sex with our partner. For many, this is even more embarrassing than being caught cheating. The big question is: what is the best way to react in such a moment?
What to do when children catch their parents having sex?
“Child caught having sex” – Sounds funny to outsiders – often a real problem for parents!
There is a lot of discussion about sexuality these days, and today’s parents are much more open-minded than they used to be. But even if we now talk casually with our best friends about the various sex practices and we don’t mind buying a vibrator in an erotic shop, we are somehow embarrassed when our own child suddenly stands in front of the bed during sex. Many parents find it so unpleasant to be interrupted by their daughter or son during lovemaking because they often worry about the child’s reaction to it. They fear that the offspring will be frightened or even get a “crack” on the psychological level if they see their parents in this situation. But that’s not the case. Toddlers usually don’t even notice what’s going on when they suddenly stand in the bedroom, and schoolchildren usually know exactly what their parents are “doing” with each other and will almost automatically retreat to their room. First and foremost, remember that sex is a natural act, with nothing embarrassing or reprehensible about it. And then face the questions of your child – if it has any.
Caught by the child having sex – “What are you actually doing there???”
If the offspring is in the bedroom door, you interrupt the lovemaking as a matter of course. Now don’t nervously cover all the bare skin or flee the bed in embarrassment. If the child wants to go under the covers, the three of you simply cuddle up and enjoy the time together. Perhaps the son or daughter will ask questions. What are you actually doing here? Why are you naked? Is mom in pain or why is she moaning so loud? As a parent, some childlike considerations will surely make you smile. Your offspring is also thinking about it. Only provide as much information as your child asks for. Explain what they were doing in an age-appropriate and clear way. In the case of a toddler, the statement that mom and dad were just cuddling together is sufficient. because they love each other so much. You can explain to an older child that you just had sex with each other and that it was born out of this act of love. Whether the word “sex” is used or not, of course, depends on whether the offspring can relate to this term.
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Privacy in the bedroom
Many parents wonder if they can lock the bedroom door behind them when they want to have sex. Yes of course. Everyone has the right to some privacy, and that applies to parents as much as it does to children. At the latest when the offspring reaches puberty, they too experience their own sexuality and expect their parents to take it into account. (More on the subject of The First Time ) Even children of primary school age can be taught by parents not to just walk into the bedroom without being asked, but to knock first. Of course, the parents shouldn’t just burst into their children’s rooms either.
Sex when the kids are out
That the child catches the parents having sex is really not bad. But of course the respective practice also plays a role. The typical missionary position under the covers will not leave any child confused – small children often do not even realize what their parents are actually doing. But when mom is in the love swing or handcuffed to the bed, this sight can be a bit confusing for the offspring. Unusual sexual practices should therefore take place behind closed doors or when the kids are out of the house. In this way, parents can relax and pursue their desires without having to expect questioning looks from the little ones. Or you are planning a weekend without children .
Yes, parents are also allowed to live out their sexuality. This need does not simply end after the birth of the child. With age-appropriate education, you can make a significant contribution to ensuring that the subject of sexuality is addressed openly. If you are then caught having sex again by the child, the situation is no longer quite as unpleasant for both parties.