What to do when the grandparents spoil the grandchildren?
Grandchildren and their grandparents are usually like allies. Behind the parents’ backs, imposed bans are circumvented with a wink and later kept as a little secret. Grandparents are indulgent, loving and seem to anticipate every wish from the eyes of the sweet offspring. This cliché is often true. Children just love what makes parents sigh and look up at the sky! But don’t worry – this grandparent’s love and forbearance does not harm the children. It is even good for the offspring and in most cases has a positive effect on child development. But what should you do when the grandparents give the grandchildren money ?
How can you celebrate Christmas?
Why do grandparents spoil their grandchildren?
Grandparents have one big advantage over the children’s parents: experience! After all, they’ve been parents for a long time, and over the years they may have secretly recognized mistakes they made in their upbringing. Some would like to make up for these mistakes and, for example, compensate for the harshness and severity of the past with a lot of good nature and care for the grandchildren. In a well-dosed measure, this behavior also benefits the grandchildren. Furthermore, grandparents simply have more time, peace and patience than the younger couples. Your everyday life is not characterized by hectic and stress, especially if you have already retired. Then looking after the grandchildren is a welcome change for the grandparents, to which they devote themselves self-sacrificingly.
The grandchildren are usually the center of attention and enjoy the undivided attention of grandma and grandpa. In addition, the older generation has often achieved a certain level of financial independence in the course of their lives and is particularly happy to pass this on to their grandchildren – for example in the form of gifts or attractive leisure activities. Of course, this is always extremely well received by children, and grandparents are always very popular with them. However, problems can arise here if the grandparents really want to buy the favor of their grandchildren and fulfill almost every wish. If this situation occurs, it is imperative that the child’s parents intervene and prevent this behavior as far as possible. A reasonable conversation clarifies the fronts, even if the insight is sometimes a bit long in coming.
How should parents deal with this?
In order to generally avoid disputes, grandparents should stay out of the upbringing of their children as much as possible. In particular, rules that are extremely important to the parents – such as television viewing or the type of diet – must not be broken by the grandparents, no matter how much they love them. A clear agreement and compliance with basic agreements is a prerequisite for harmonious coexistence, which is to the advantage of everyone involved and from which the whole family can benefit.