Mother – father – child – games are important for children. Within these role-playing games, our children get to know social structures and process their own family experiences in the same way. But nowadays the classic family image has changed. There is no longer only the traditional structure of a standard family, which was still considered conventional in the 1950s. Single-parent families are increasingly shaping our society. Not only do the parents have to know how to deal with the new form of family, the children are also forced to define a new image of their own family.
Suddenly a single parent with a child and a job
According to the Federal Statistical Office, around 2.17 million mothers and around 407,000 fathers were single parents in Germany in 2018. Ascending trend. There are many reasons for this new way of life. Very few people plan to raise a child without a partner. They only find themselves in this difficult situation when they separate or divorce their partner or, in the worst case, become widowed. The partners in a relationship certainly do not take the risk of separation lightly if they are aware that they are also responsible for one or more children. Rather, those affected see themselves at the mercy of the new situation. And the constant feeling of fear hovers over you. Also read: How to Introduce the new partner to the children ?
The number of single mothers is significantly higher than that of fathers. However, there is a trend towards growth among single fathers, while the number of single mothers in 2018 is the lowest for many years.
Flu or cold: these are the distinguishing features
problems of single parents
In view of the problem of wage differences between men and women and the difficulty of finding suitable childcare, single mothers in particular often find themselves in financial difficulties. Despite alimony and child benefit , some women are unable to raise their child on their own. More than 1/3 of the families receive additional financial help from the state in the form of a child allowance for single parents and are therefore dependent on social transfers. It is alarming that child poverty most common in single parents. This is just one of the problems, albeit the biggest, that single-parent families face. Single parents quickly feel overwhelmed, they lack confirmation from their partner in certain situations and it is not uncommon for another person to settle conflicts to be missing. Due to the double burden, many parents also fear that they will no longer be able to do justice to their children. They underestimate their abilities. Due to the lack of a second reference person, children of single parents have a particularly close bond with their mother or father. Despite everything, parents must not see their children as substitute partners. Even in single-parent families, children are not yet emotionally able to solve the problem situations of adults.
So that single parents do not slip into social isolation, they should seek reassurance from friends, acquaintances or family and, if necessary, accept support if it is offered. In addition to your own circle of helpers, you will find additional support in educational counseling centers. The population’s views of single parents are now changing. The media are dealing with the topic, the economy is slowly adjusting to the new family structure. Raising your child without a partner is no longer necessarily a flaw. The single-parent families learn to surpass themselves, discover completely new qualities in themselves and enjoy the new independence of the individual members.
Almost every fifth family in Germany is a single-parent family. Let’s just see it as a model for a new independence, even if those affected would certainly prefer a couple relationship. So are single parents a form of family with a future? The answer is obvious. Two-person relationships with a child or children are not the obsolete model. But we can no longer describe single parents with children as an unconventional phenomenon. The main thing is that children and adults find satisfaction and happiness in their form of relationship. We don’t all fit into one standard model.
And many single parents have shown that “single parents with a child and a job” can work well!