When babies are pure mama’s children

Every baby is a very unique little person, and siblings often differ noticeably in their behavior and idiosyncrasies even in the first few weeks of life. Some mothers are pushed to their limits by a baby who, on principle, only feels comfortable with mom and rejects every other caregiver with loud shrieks.

This is just as difficult a situation for fathers as it is for mothers, because no one likes to be rejected and be the second choice, and no one really wants to have to be there 24 hours a day to avoid a drama.

Is it because of the mother as mother hen?

There is often well-intentioned advice for families with a baby who only wants to deal with mom, saying that it is not the baby but the mother who promotes this effect by overfeeding. – That she is the one who cannot let go of her child and therefore “stranges” the child from father, grandparents and aunts.

Tendency to mother-child can be innate

The fact is that for most children, the “alien phase” only begins in the seventh to ninth month of life and the majority of babies are very relaxed with different caregivers up to that point. But a large part is never a whole and so there are also babies whose brain chemistry dictates a mother-child tendency from birth. In development science, it is said that 40% of babies are not easily disturbed by anything, another 40% prefer to be with their mother, but are just as relaxed about a brief separation. Around 20% of babies are very demanding, show very strong separation fears and cling to mom’s skirts around the clock.

So what to do with a mother-child?

On the one hand, it is important to give in to the child’s innate need for security – a mother-child wants to experience closeness and trust from the mother in the first few months and should also learn bonding skills in this way.

On the other hand, it is also important to take countermeasures gently from the start: the world will not end if mum goes to gymnastics once a week or goes shopping in peace and quiet and in the meantime dad takes over the baby service.

There will be a lot of screaming at first, but over time the baby will learn that daddy can cuddle too and offers security and safety.

So, as is so often the case, the golden mean is the best choice here.

Regardless of whether it is a mother’s child or a father’s child:

Babies don’t just want to be fed and changed regularly – newborns need close attention and warmth from the start.

Nest warmth is indispensable for the right mental, physical and spiritual development. – On the one hand, one speaks of physical closeness through cuddling together and baby massage can also be extremely suitable for this. Many midwives are already giving young parents the first tips and tricks for more physical closeness and bonding with the child. Pediatricians are also available for questions and suggestions. Above all, the closeness to the child is also a pleasure for the parents!

Not only the cuddling course makes it – the little people should be addressed with attention and interest right from the start. It is always important to have a friendly voice and especially facial expressions! Babies study facial expressions closely from the start – facial expressions are the first thing they try to interpret and learn from. That’s why a baby never cries right away when they see someone new, but looks at their facial features for a few seconds and then decides whether someone seems friendly or “angry”. Parents should always keep this in mind and have a positive and joyful impact on their child.

The seriousness of life should play absolutely no role for a small baby – trust and tenderness and a positive attitude towards life should be conveyed to your offspring from day one. So cuddle, laugh and enjoy together!