When the baby cries as soon as dad has it in his arms
Shortly before the birth, the future still seems rosy: parents want to take care of their baby together and support each other in doing so. But what if the little one reacts with panic and screams loudly as soon as dad tries to pick it up? Dealing with a “mama baby” is then not easy and can even threaten the harmony. What Parents Need to Know:
Also read: Calm down crying babies
Is this still normal?
Many parents worry when a baby turns away from its father and only lets mom carry and comfort it. The question of whether this behavior is normal then inevitably arises. But the all-clear is sound: Some babies are very fixated on their mothers, because they usually spend a large part of their time with them. Anything out of the ordinary can frighten them. Even the loving father, who really only wants the best for his child, may then become an “unwelcome stranger”. (More info on Anxiety in Children )
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Compulsion can make the situation worse
Some parents try to break their baby’s strong fixation by forcing them to separate from their mother. However, this is not a good idea, because it quickly happens that fears and panic reactions intensify. It is better to bring about a gradual and careful dissolution of the fixation. For example, parents can cuddle together with their baby and do the diapering together for a while. The baby then learns to accept dad as a second caregiver and learns that he poses no danger.
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Main mantra: “It’s just a phase”
Many fathers despair when their baby doesn’t want to be with them and unintentionally take their rejection personally. However, they should always keep in mind that this is a natural protective reaction of little people, which has nothing to do with a lack of sympathy. Experience has shown that phases in which the baby is very clingy will pass again. Later it may even be that dad is your favorite cuddle partner for a while. Under no circumstances should couples argue about the situation. Taking the child away from the currently rejected parent hurts their feelings. A relationship crisis can quickly develop after the birth . Working together on bonding the child to both parents is the be-all and end-all for a healthy relationship.
What can parents of a mama baby do?
Parents can take countermeasures. Especially in the early days, many mothers find it difficult to let their baby out of their hands. Fathers are then quickly sidelined and can no longer find the right access. However, if you make sure to plan “dad time” from the beginning, you can prevent some parenting phases. This is also good for mothers who need some time for themselves now and then.
Read more: Mothers need breaks too